I grab a cup of coffee, my favorite flannel blanket, light a candle and curl up on the chair in my office. This is my safe space where I ponder and reflect on all things related to living. I plan, I write, I meditate in this sacred space. To my left is a rustic cross made from barn siding with the word “PRAY” strategically placed on the crossbar. Everything about this room tells me to take a breath and trust.
Today I come into this space with a heavy heart. As tears well up and pour down my cheeks, I struggle to accept change. This isn’t the first time I have needed to accept change. It won’t be the last. Nor is it the first time change is accompanied by tears.
It would seem change is inevitable. And many times it is accompanied by a bit of struggle or pain. Remember when you started school? First grade was a big deal. A lot of change. New kids to meet. Wondering if there would be friends. And years later I sent my children to first grade. They seemed so small and vulnerable. That was a moment for tears.
Getting married brought a lot of change into my life. I moved 2000 miles away from my home town to a community quite different from my own. Everything about my new life was different – church, family, style of dress, customs. There were many moments of tears in that transition. Years later, I watched my own children marry. Their faces, filled with joy, looked at another with the love and adoration that used to be mine. While it was a good and necessary change, tears were shed in my quiet place.
Relationships are essential for life. Like air to our lungs, we survive change by having that hand to hold. My very first friend outside of relatives was Sarah. We met on the bus the first year of school. This year, we have known one another for 50 years! That’s a long time. As adults, we pursued our own paths and settled in very different locations, but you never forget that first friendly hand.
There were many other friends after that. Really great women, and a few men, who helped make transitions in life just a little bit easier. At times these relationships got out of whack. By that I mean, I relied too heavily on one person or another. Learning to let go was extremely difficult. A time for tears.
The birth of children, changes in employment, moves to new homes, aging parents, aging me – and the list goes on and on – bring change in good ways. But always change is accompanied by a struggle and many times, tears.
As I reflect on change, the eyes of my heart search for something that is stable. Is anything constant? Even the weather changes from season to season!
I begin to make a list. I don’t think it will be very long.
Like I said, the list is short. There is a common theme in these verses, pointing to the aspect of God that never changes. It is his character, his holiness, his Word. He chose us – humans – to be his people. And he will not change his mind about that. No matter what we do, we are his children.
But does anything about God ever change? I find verses that say God changed his mind. So is he fickle? I need to know, because the rest of life seems to be pretty prone to change.
I invite you to join me this week as I take a look at a few verses that seem to indicate God does change his mind. What’s that about? Maybe you are like me and you could use a little stability in your life right now.
Until tomorrow…
May the Lord bless you and protect you.
May the Lord smile on you and be gracious to you.
May the Lord show you his favor and give you his peace.
Numbers 6:24-26
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